“To blog or not to blog”, that was again the question this week but this time, dear reader, for a much more important reason. On Wednesday I lost the sight in my right eye. And it may be permanent. Pretty shocking, huh? Pretty lousy huh? That’s what I thought too and still do. But something happened since that event that has made up my mind to (for now) keep this blog going. Here’s what happened…
I received a very late comment on last week’s post (yesterday to be exact) from a sweet soul named Nadine who knew nothing of my condition yet in her sentiment innocently included the words, “… keep on even if you do not write nothing.” Well those words in some way touched me, how I can’t tell you, and they made up my mind to try and keep on blogging. Now some might say, “Aw, man, it’s just a silly blog… what’s the big deal?” Well if you read my “Happy Birthday” post you’d know why I find this blogging stuff a big deal. And why I’ve decided to keep on even if I do not write nothing.
So how did this happen, you ask, this insane turn of events of which I write? Well, I’d like to say it happened after your friendly bartender jumped over the bar to defend some woman’s honor and an errant bottle sent him into partial darkness. Yes, I’d like to say that’s what brought this about but it simply wouldn’t be true, for everyone knows I can’t jump over the bar I have to walk around. (insert chuckle)
No, dear reader, this was the result of an arrow of fate that found its way into an artery and kept on going till settled in the middle of my eye. Forget the technical term for this mess, what it amounts to is I had a stroke in my eye. That’s what happened.
It occurred this past Wednesday as I was sitting having my lunch, thumbing through the New York Times, when this burst of light suddenly flashed into being. Just like that… POW!!! And in a matter of minutes I was off to an ophthalmologist then quickly on to a specialist, and the prognosis at day’s end was that I may never see again from my right eye. There is a glimmer of hope however, at least I choose to think so, as there exists a glimmer of light on the right periphery. But if not, if my hope and intentions fall short of the mark there are worst things in life to endure… fate’s arrow could’ve alighted in a far worse place.
As for now though (as I adjust to this new phenomenon), and because I’m having trouble with depth perception, I won’t be behind the stick this coming week. Or maybe even the next. But I will be back, in more ways than one, you can count on it.
So on a brighter note, dear reader, as we approach Thanksgiving day, we all have much to be thankful for… I know I do.
I am thankful that I can still walk along the streets of New York and see a tot in a passing stroller suddenly flash me a smile for absolutely no reason.
I’m thankful that I can still on those very same streets of New York as I proceed a little further, be stopped in my tracks when I see a dog stop in its furry tracks, wag its tail, wiggle its body and give me one of those big goofy dog grins.
I’m thankful that if I walk a little further, I can still see Joey the homeless guy sitting on his same milk crate, waiting not just for my daily contribution but our conversation that always brightens our day.
I’m thankful that if I walk just a few more blocks I can still see Central Park, during this my favorite time of year, as Mother Nature in a burst of glory sheds the last of her palette, her leaves falling gracefully down onto Earth’s cold carpet.
And I’m thankful that when I get home again, after all these sights that remain a part of my life, I can still read my favorite authors, still watch Steelers football, still watch Curb Your Enthusiasm tomorrow as Larry David wraps up another brilliant season, and most of all, inside or outside in this great city of New York, I can still see the smiling faces of those I hold dear. Yes I’m thankful, dear reader, that beauty remains firmly in the eye of this beholder.
Happy Thanksgiving and I’ll try and put up something again next week-end.
PS: I’ve obviously not thrown a “pity party” here so please don’t you either if you leave a comment. Okay? Your friendly bartender is doing just fine, believe me. I may not, however, answer your comments (something that’s as much fun for me as actually writing the post) because for now it’s a little hard to be at the computer for long. But you will be read!
PPS: Hah! I just thought of a joke to make sure indeed this isn’t a pity party. I’m reminded of a cartoon that appeared in The New Yorker many years ago and it goes like this (although it’s funnier of course when you see the actual cartoon). A guy is in a hospital bed in that typical traction depiction. You know, his bandaged arm is raised in an L-shape, his leg is raised in a sling, in fact his entire body is wrapped in bandages and the only thing not covered is his right eye. Got the picture? Good. Because the caption under the doctor who is standing at bedside is this, “Hmmm, I don’t like the look of that eye!” As I said, dear reader, things could be far worse.
Over and out from Bar-land… see ya’ when I see ya’.